Blue Eyes and White Lies

A writer, lover, thinker, and midwestern, book-loving sexpot.

Literary Foreplay


tumblr_lvemjm9pIJ1qbpw11o1_500This weekend I went out to coffee with this guy I know from work. He just started a few weeks ago and he’s pretty cute. I told him I’m a writer and that I plan to finish my novel soon and he said, “No way! That’s awesome. I’d love to read your work.”

He said, “Maybe you could read my stuff, too?”

“Sure,” I said. “What do you write?”

He tells me fiction. He says he writes literary realist fiction and that sort of intimidates me. But we get coffee (NOT at the shop we work at) and chat and he’s really cool. I told him I’m not ready for anything yet. I told him about my rocky break up with Tyler and how it’s hard for me to trust people.

Prior to our meeting we agreed to each bring a short story to exchange. So we’re reading each others’ work, sipping on our lattes every few paragraphs and as I’m reading I realize: this guy can fucking write. He’s way better than me. Of course, he’s a different style and writes in a different genre, but still. Suddenly I’m way more intimidated. I can’t focus on what I’m reading because I keep thinking about what he’s reading. All the mistakes I’ve made. And ohmygod what if he’s repulsed by it.

But I swallow my worries and keep reading. When we finish we both look at each other and I’m waiting for him to speak, but since I’m afraid of what he’ll say, I talk first and tell him, “Yours was so good. I’m a little embarrassed actually.”

I didn’t want to admit that, but I did and there it was and now I hoped he’d breeze over it. But he didn’t.

“Thanks, but why are you embarrassed? I loved yours, too.”

readingIt took some talking, but after a while, he convinced me that he hadn’t judged me. Which was good. Then I asked him if he’s been published and he told me he hadn’t. I asked him about self-publishing and that’s where the story takes a turn. Basically, my new man-friend is not a fan of self-publishing, which has been my plan from pretty much the beginning. It sort of hurt at first, hearing his reasons, but he made some good points. Anyone can publish whatever they want and often time it’s bad — really bad — and anymore, he said, people are looking for an easy money maker like Fifty Shades of Gray.

It gave me a lot to think about, but in the end, I’ve decided to stick with self-publishing. It’s just the right fit for me, and I’m really going to work hard to create a stellar novel. Hopefully my new friend can help me with it.

One thing is certain, though. There’s only one thing sexier than a man who likes to read, and that’s a man who can write really fucking well. I hope our next date goes better and he can come over for some hot and heavy literary foreplay (as in reading, you perverts).


Author: Dallas Kelly

I love telling stories and interacting with new people.

15 thoughts on “Literary Foreplay

  1. That sounds like a promising start to a relationship, thinking of Mr & Mrs King (Stephen and Tabitha) both published writers who have got along so well living together for many years 😉

  2. My sweetie and I exchanged stories on our second or third date–and we’ve been exchanging them and proofreading each others’ work for six years now. There’s nothing like a love of words to make your heart go pitter patter!

  3. Love your style of writing, if only in blog-form at this stage…

  4. Out of all the self published books I’ve read only one was bad – the story was good but the writing was so poor that I finely gave up trying to read it after a few pages. Self published authors write because they love to write while most authors working for the publishing houses make a living writing what they are told to write instead of what they love to write. As a result I now purchase far more books written by self publishing authors than I do books written by authors published by the book publishers.

    • As a former acquisitions editor for a traditional publisher, I disagree with your assessment that “authors working for the publishing houses make a living writing what they are told to write instead of what they love to write.” Authors write what they love; editors help them shape the work into (everyone hopes) something even more marketable. As a freelance editor now, I, too, support indy authors, and they are the majority of my clients, but I think your statement is unfair to those whose work is (by desire or luck) picked up by a traditional publisher. The work of elf-publishing authors is more respected when their work is vetted . . . and that begins with self-editing. A good story is a good story, and when it is well written and edited, it’s ready for the world. There aren’t enough hours in the day to read all the great work that’s being self-published, so I don’t want to waste my time slogging through something that is just thrown out there.

  5. What a fun post and fantastic first date. I love the graphics. Best wishes for meet-up #2 and for your story.

  6. I really like your blog!

    I can’t wait for your novel to come out – it probably isn’t in the sort of genre I read mostly but I’m still definitely going to read it.

    So, yeah, thanks!

  7. Here’s some more info on self-publishing. Don’t get discouraged. I like your writing. I put a couple of my small writings on my blog also.

    ” E-book expert David Carnoy has some great advice for would-be e-authors. Here’s what he has to say (excerpted from Carnoy’s How to Self-Publish an E-book):

    It’s gotta be good. The same rule applies to self-published e-books as it does to print books. You have to start with a good product if you have any hope of selling it.
    Create an arresting cover. When it comes to e-books, everything starts with the cover image. Creating an eye-catching, professional-looking cover that also looks good small (it has to stand out as a thumbnail image, since it’s being sold online) is easier said than done, but it can really make a difference in terms of sales. I can’t tell you how many bad self-published covers are out there.
    Price your e-book cheaply. You should sell your e-book for less than $4.99. Most successful e-book authors are finding the greatest success in the $0.99-$2.99 range (it’s important to note that Amazon’s 70% royalty for authors only applies to Kindle books priced between $2.99 and $9.99; otherwise, the rate drops down to 35%). Avoid outfits that don’t let you set the price. This is one of the cardinal rules of self-publishing an e-book. You must be able to control the pricing of your e-book. If you want to sell it for $0.99, then you should be able to sell it for $0.99.
    Marketing is about creating awareness for your e-book. Book marketing is simply about creating awareness, and you need to do that however you can—whether through social media, blogging, or passing out fliers on a street corner.”

  8. I 100% understand. You say you’re a writer and immediately get, “oh cool! Are you published?” to which you respond, “no, I’m self publishing.” “Oh…”
    Don’t ever get discouraged! There will always be haters and lovers. It’s a choice you make, one that doesn’t come easy, but it feels so great once you make it.
    I love your writing – it looks like I have a lot of the same thoughts you do! Thanks so much for visiting my blog, I’m glad I stopped by!

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